|B A S I C S
||"Til Death Do You Part - Marry Yourself!"
is a one-on-one live-art piece
You "marry yourself" - not someone else.
You take it as seriously or whimsically as you like.
It's art, which may be your religion but that's none of our business.
| E N C O U R A G I N G
P R I E S T E S S
writer/interdisciplinary performance artist/filmmaker/candy coated subversive
|B O O K I N G S
|P R E S S
||Articles about us - Sara Benincasa for XO Jane 01 (as pdf) & 02 (as pdf)
and Jen+Peter/Greenpointers (as pdf)
||Go HERE to sign up. Very few updates, promise.
This list is for Gabrielle/ThoSE productions' upcoming events.
THoSE=The House of St. Eve
F A Q
You will marry yourself (not someone else) in this quickie, Lost-Vegas parody of a western marriage ceremony, but cheaper. It's also Non-denominational.
No need for a bride nor groom, nor anything else.
All you need is your willingness to commit to an experience.
We provide an Encouraging Priestess, a host-guide, some costuming, refreshments, toy rings, a mirror and multiple-choice vows. You get a personal wedding cupcake, a photo, and bubbly.
If we're flush, we also give you "Just Married" helium balloons for you to flaunt.
There are pre-printed multiple choice vows to use as inspiration to write your own
or you can just check off the boxes.
Here is a sample PDF of vows.
You may bring your own rings and vows.
Want the mini-exorcism/divorce from past selves? Just ask. It's on the form.
Wear whatever makes you happy - costumes are welcome. It's your ceremony.
Friends and Groups may attend at your discretion or you may go it in private.
It's your wedding.
You can even take vows together, but you would not be marrying each other.
It would just be noisy.
Fun, tender, spirited, but noisy. And that's fine too.
It's your wedding.
It's kitschy and celebratory, but honestly, there is power in the vows.
Once you fill out the vows, you'll realized that you deserve as much love, support and discipline as you give and expect from others. Or not, and maybe you have work ahead of you. Or maybe it's just fun food for thought. We encourage thoughts.
Take your vows home as a personal contract.
It's all you, baby. We're just here to encourage you.
P H I L O S O P H Y
Are you ready to marry yourself?
YOU! ... JUST YOU.
Two people marrying each other is often a marriage of families, regardless of economic background. When you marry yourself, it's just between you and you. Your left and right brain. You can invite friends and family to your sacred ritual, but since you are both bride and groom, you don't have to worry about politics. You can, if you like, create a wishlist or registry if you need some Calphalon pans or a bread machine after your nuptials. At least your friends know who will keep their gift if you break up. And I'm here to tell you that you really have no choice but to work through the hard times. Your vows will be etched in your soul until death do you part.
HIGHS AND LOWS
What you will encounter is your own depths and your own glass ceilings. You might encounter old bugaboos like the age-old question, "Would you marry you, knowing what you do?" This is where it gets interesting and your vows are key to the experience. Choose wisely.
THE POWER IS YOURS
Some people are living a life that is fully committed to the kind of happiness that inherently breeds solid relationships with other people. This is different than simply being committed to other people. You can do that too, but only after you've gotten serious about who you are, what you want, and what you are convinced you deserve.
This is the work after the ceremony. If monogamy makes you feel that you are missing out on life, then you are coming from a place of lack. When you are whole, then anybody else you connect with is a partner on your journey, an enhancement to your life. The self-wedding ceremony is meant to spur you forth into this journey.
YOU WILL CHANGE AND THAT'S OKAY
Your choices about what is acceptable, perfect or joyous may change, but the point is to give it all some thought. You're not an oarless boat unless you want to be. Apathy is also a choice.
Married people are confident and alluring to others. Marrying yourself is about making considered choices and sticking to them with integrity. I have cheated on myself many times but I am still together and going strong. Integrity is difficult because it requires more than self-policing. It is about permanent internal change and evolution.
Any wedding is just "day one" of your marriage. Be okay with failing some days and you'll drive yourself less crazy if you are the worrying kind. If you are already married or are thinking of marrying another person in the traditional sense, you are not cheating. The core idea is to free your relationships from neediness. I like to think of life as a vehicle that I drive, and my friends, family and partners are my passengers not hijackers. Let's make it a good trip.
I'm also convinced that even kitschy, arty steps toward self-realization relieve stress and are therefore good for your skin.
'Til Death Do You Part - Marry Yourself!
is performed for private events and also publicly.
Chashama - Special thanks to Janusz Jaworski and Anita Durst of Chashama. Lovelove to my honorable Host-Guides and Helpers - randomly: Ahnika Delirium, Thomas Gordon, Raven Solano, Big Bruce, AJ Slater, Christian Xtn Hansen (cake!), Dana Divine, Lamia Akar, Abby Ehmann, Anastasia Kolesnyk, Gloria Garcia, Rachel Alba, Dan Glass, Mr. Ppn, the window artist John Bonafede (who also helped with setup), and the amazing Alexander Lyle for creating the magical pathway as well as guiding people on.
Figment Festivals (various over the years) - Special Thanks to Smash and "Not that Dave".
And smooches to my lovely host guides - Ahnika Delerium, Justin Brinker and Sarah Sparkles, Lamia Akar, Thomas Gordon, Michelle Bruenn, and Ppn xo
The Lost Horizon Night Market (truly a Figment of your imagination, but not ours) - Special thanks to Mark and Kevin. Warm, yummy fuzzies to the Host-Guides Ammo and double-duty/interior designer Alexander Lyle and the angel, Ppn.
KKProjects - Life is Art Foundation
as part of the New Orleans Biennial - PROSPECT 1
Special thanks to performance curator: Kóan Jeff Baysa, KK Gallery people: Kirsha Kaechele, Katherine Bray, Adrinadrina, especially Andrew Freeman for his utter selflessness, and love to Ego Artifex - Don Guarnieri.
The Spill Festival for Visions of Excess
at The Shunt Vaults in London
Special Thanks to Nicole Blackman, Ron Athey, Lee Adams,
Robert Pacitti, (Estelle & Jen from Pacitti Co)
Nao + the sexy boy who also helped with setup,
Miss Bernadette Louise and my supercharming host, Geordi Blake.
Endless Night Festival at The House of Blues, New Orleans
Special Thanks to Father Sebastiaan and my lovely hostess Zalia Beville
Burning Man - Ppn and Katy Cole rocked the Host-Guide posts. Mwah!